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Signs that you „just might“ have a drinking problem

You lose arguments with inanimate objects.

You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the
earth.

Your job is interfering with your drinking.

Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.

Sincerely believe alcohol to be the elusive 5th food group.

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?? I think
not!

Two hands and just one mouth … now THAT’S a drinking
problem!

The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the
bar.

Every woman you see has an exact twin.

You fall off the floor.

Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger — forget
dinner!

The glass keeps missing your mouth.

Bill Clinton starts to make sense.

Mosquitoes catch a buzz* after biting you.

The whole bar says ‚Hi‘ when you come in.

"Hi ocifer. I’m not under the affluence of
incohol."

You have a reserved parking space at the liquor store.

"BeerTender! Get me another Bar!"